Posted by Paul Stephenson on September 28th, 2012
John Terry
Every other Soundgarden song except that terrible one they did for the Avengers soundtrack
Running out of milk
the Daily Mail website
People who complain about the Daily Mail website
Crywanking
Chad Kroeger and Avril Lavigne
Burning hair
Chinese burns
Boris Johnson
Marmite
First Buses
Hollyoaks plot lines
Having to work as a writer on Hollyoaks
Doctor Who fans
People on Twitter
Being friends on Facebook with your family
Sour milk
Papercuts
Doing a sick in your mouth
John Terry again
Cats on the Internet
Hip replacement surgery
People who think Three Wolf Moon is funny
Thinking this article was a good idea
Mitt Romney
Ashley Cole
Channel 5 news
The Pigeon Detectives
Come Dine With me
Cancer of the puppy
The guy who narrates the X Factor and Come Dine With Me
Following through
Obesity epidemics
Nappy rash
Winter
When your jeans get ripped in the crotch
Press releases
Audioslave
Stubbed toes
ITV Sport commentary
Mucus
the word ‘moist’
John Terry
ITV
Midsummer Murders
Neighbours
Nightmares
Over friendly dogs
Excrement on your shoe
Flooding
Mondays
The new Devil Sold His Soul album
Muse
The Stone Roses
People who like Morrissey
Facebook
Found Footage horror films
You
Bedsheets that come off when you turn over
Light margerine
Low fat snacks
Broken headphones
Children
Glasses without lenses
Ugly people
Being skint
Adverts with footballers in
Not being able to download an album you want the second it comes out
Spiders
Formula One
Richard Littlejohn
Downton Abbey
Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes
Sticky things
John Terry
The special effects at the end of Star Wars Episode II
Still thinking Star Wars is the best film ever into your thirties
Keep Calm and Carry On
The Blackadder Millenium Special
Splitting the Hobbitt into more than one film
Skinny Jeans
Michael Jackson’s last album
Simon Pegg’s career
The Only Way Is Essexmas
Kim Kardashian
Steel Panther
The futility of existence
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